1. Clarify what you are looking for.

The first step is to think about the issue that you are trying to address. If you are considering therapy – whether to restore a relationship, recover from trauma, adjust to a new life phase, improve your mental health, or just talk with someone – finding the right therapist is the first hurdle to cross.

Even if you feel drawn to a certain type of therapy, having a good connection with your therapist is one of the most important things to establish. That means feeling listened to, understood, and respected. Successful therapy often requires deliberate trial and error. Think of it like having your car repaired. If you were not happy with you mechanic, then you would most likely look for a new one. The same applies for therapists and counsellors. It is a good idea to be open to changing them, if it does not feel right.

Researchers have found that the bond between you and your therapist is likely to have a big effect on your growth. That is why it is important to do your research, ask questions, and pay attention to your own responses when searching for the right therapist.

2. What therapeutic style is right for me?

If you are thinking of trying therapy, you might have already noticed the surprising amount of types available. Though some approaches work best for specific conditions, others can help with a range of issues.

In therapy, you will work with a trained mental health professional. What you will do in each appointment depends on the preferred methods of your therapist and the issues you are looking to address.

Understanding the different philosophies behind each type of therapy can help you figure out which approach is best for you, so ask the therapist what method they prefer to work with. The four main styles of therapy are:

a) Psychodynamic therapy developed from psychoanalysis, a long-tern approach to mental health treatment and often focuses on unconscious processes.

What it is good for: depression, anxiety, eating disorders, somatic symptoms, substance use disorders

b) Behavioural therapy is a focused, action-oriented approach to mental health treatment.

What it is good for: anxiety, phobias, substance use, ADHD, obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD)

c) Cognitive behavioural therapy or CBT is a short-term approach to mental health treatment. It is like behavioural therapy, but it also addresses unhelpful thought patterns or problematic thoughts.

CBT can also be very helpful for certain conditions when combined with medication.

What it is good for: Mood disorders such as depression and bipolar disorder, anxiety and phobias, eating disorders, substance misuse

d) Humanistic therapy is an approach that looks at how your worldview affects the choices you make, especially choices that cause distress. It is based on the belief that you are the best person to understand your experiences and needs.

What it is good for: Self-esteem issues, difficulty coping with chronic health concerns, effects of trauma, relationship issues, feelings of worthlessness or being lost in life.

Along with the approaches mentioned above, another method that is been shown to help with trauma is EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitisation Reprocessing). This is a technique designed to help people process traumatic memories and reduce their emotional distress. It helps the brain reprocess the memory and reduce its negative impact.

Therapy can sometimes feel challenging, regardless of the approach you choose. Initially, it is not uncommon to feel uncomfortable or nervous about discussing your symptoms and personal thoughts with a stranger, but you should soon build a rapport, and it often gets easier over time to provide very worthwhile support.

Talk to your doctor or a medical professional you trust – they often know reliable therapists or services they can recommend.