3. Ask questions

If you cannot think of anything to say, ask a question. It does not have to be deeply personal, it could be based on the current situation, such as “what did you think of the presentation?” A 2012 study from Harvard University found that self-disclosure activates brain regions associated with reward. That is, people love talking about themselves.

4. End with an opening

So you have had a great conversation with a new person and you are getting on well. How do you progress it to friendship?

Dr Franco suggests inviting them to an exclusive activity. “Once you find a person you like, think about generating exclusivity, which means having an experience with that person that you do not have with everyone else in the group.”

How to keep new friends

After you have established a friendship, one great way to strengthen it is to tell your friend how much you value them.

If that idea fills you with awkwardness, do not worry. There are ways to do it without it sounding cheesy. Here are two easy ways recommended by Dr Marisa Franco:

1. Tell them in passing

As you go about your day, if you think of your friend, tell them. The classic “I saw this meme and thought of you,” is a classic for a reason. Franco says these small notes show your friend you genuinely care for them and lets them know it is safe to invest in your friendship.

2. Share your little vulnerabilities

Let them in on the little things: the trashy reality program you love, your irritation over leaf blowers on Saturday mornings. Sharing vulnerabilities, even small ones, creates connection and trust. It allows your friend to open up about their own world in turn.

So why do we do it?

As humans, we have a cognitive basis towards the negative. We are conditioned to search for and hone in on potential threats. This served us well in the distant past when we had to avoid predators. In our current society, this can go haywire.

While some people only catastrophise about certain aspects of life, such as their health, or the kids’ safety, or their career, for many people, it is a mental habit.

It can be triggered by prolonged stress (such as ongoing global pandemic and economic crisis), but it is often built-in from an early age.

Note: While catastrophising can simply be a bad habit, it can also be a sign that you may be experiencing burnout, or that your mental health is suffering in another way.

Reach out for professional help if you are struggling. If you or someone you know is in crisis, call Emergency Services. For further information and support, ask your doctor for guidance.

How to stop catastrophising

The most proven and effective way to break the cycle of catastrophic thinking is become aware of it. “Awareness is essential,” says David Robson, “so the first step should be to pause your thinking and to recognise when your mind is going down a psychological black hole.”

The keywords to watch out for are “always” and “never”, the key feelings are dread and doom. Then, challenge your automatic thoughts and question whether they are rational or realistic.

A good trick here is to imagine you are advising a friend. If your friend had a presentation due to work, and they believe they are going to mess it up and embarrass themselves, get fired and never find a good job again, what would you tell them?

Chances are you would remind them of times when they have done well and you would encourage them to rationally problem-solve by spending more time preparing and practising. Remember, you do not have to believe everything you think!

Watercress is naturally:

• high in vitamins A, K, B6, folate and C (the vitamin C helps you absorb the iron in watercress)
• high in calcium potassium, manganese and iron
• rich in dietary nitrates, linked to improved athletic performance
• packed full of antioxidants – watercress has 40 unique flavonoids such as isothiocynates, which give it its peppery flavour. Studies have linked antioxidants with a lower risk of cancer, diabetes and heart disease.

Better for your brain

Another reason to eat watercress? Your brain health. Psychiatrist Dr Drew Ramsay is a world leader in nutritional psychiatry – the use of food and nutrition to optimise brain health. He and his team devised the Antidepressant Food Score to determine the most nutrient-dense foods to help prevent and promote recovery from depression. Top of their list was watercress, with a score of 127 per cent.

Do not confuse watercress with the much smaller and delicate garden cress or mustard cress. Watercress packs more punch flavour wise and has bigger leaves, and as its name suggests, grows in water rather than soil.

Naturally peppery, watercress is a delicious addition to salads, can be made into soup, into sauces such as pesto, added to curries, and mixed into rice with chopped herbs.

Here is how spending time in sunlight and fresh air can help you feel better physically and mentally:

1. You can rewind and recharge.

Being outdoors offers a mental and emotional refuge from the overstimulation of flashing screens and vibrating phones. Research suggests spending time in nature and green spaces can help you feel more relaxed and focused, and boost your energy by nearly 40 per cent, which can only benefit you as you head back to work after your break.

2. You will improve your sleep.

Your body’s internal clock generally follows the sun, so you are more awake during the day and sleep better at night. Sunlight affects your circadian rhythm more than electric light, which means that exposing yourself to sunlight can improve your sleep. How? Stepping out into sunlight can help you feel more tired at night, shorten the time it takes to fall asleep, and improve the quality of your rest.

3. Your mood may benefit.

Getting outside into sunlight can often help ease the symptoms of depression such as low mood and fatigue. Experts are not really sure why, but sunlight is believed to increase the body’s level of serotonin, a brain chemical strongly linked to mood.

The right shoes for the job

Shoes play a vital role in supporting your feet, as well as in protecting them from external dangers. Some occupations need specific footwear for safety reasons, such as steel caps or chemical resistant material. As a general guideline, you should look for shoes with the following:

• A well-padded sole – to absorb and reduce pressure on the feet.
• A heel less than 2.5cm high – high heels increase the pressure on the ball of the foot.
• Material that breathes – fungal infections like tinea thrive in warm, moist environments. Leather is preferred for shoe uppers, with synthetic or rubber best for the sole as they are often more durable, shock absorbent and provide better grip.
• Laces, straps or buckles to secure shoes to your feet, so you are not ‘clawing’ your toes to keep them on.
• Plenty of room. Your toes should not touch the end of your shoes or you can damage your nails and toes. For this reason, it is best to shop for shoes in the afternoon as most feet tend to swell during the day.

If you are in the Southern Hemisphere, you get a preview of the upcoming flu season by watching what is happening in similar countries in the Northern Hemisphere. And the same is true if you are in the Northern Hemisphere – the Southern Hemisphere flu season gives you an idea of what the next flu season may look like.

Over the Northern Hemisphere winter, the US experienced the worst flu season since the start of the pandemic. According to the Bedford Lab, which studies the spread of viruses, the last season was one of the worst flu seasons of the decade.

People had not been exposed to the flu virus in more than two years, and this impacted their natural immunity. The Northern Hemisphere flu season also started earlier than usual, and many people who intended to get the flu vaccine left it too late.

What the flu vaccine does

Similar to the COVID-19 vaccine, the flu vaccine does not always prevent the flu, but it does reduce your chances of getting it. Flu vaccination prevents illness in approximately up to 6 to 10 healthy adults under the age of 65. Because the vaccine is not effective in absolutely every case, some people may still catch the virus after having the flu shot. But the risk of illness is still reduced, and the severity of symptoms if you do catch it.

Can you get covid and flu vaccines together?

It is safe to get your flu vaccination and COVID-19 vaccination or booster on the same day if you want to. Remember, the flu shot will not protect you from COVID-19, and the COVID-19 vaccine will not protect you from the flu.

When was the last time you sorted through the photos on your phone? The average smartphone user has a whopping 2100 photos on their phone. Lose your phone, and all those memories are gone.

You can upload them onto your computer, but then what? Never look at them again?

Instead, why not get them off your phone and into a phone book?

A photo book isn’t just a great gift or centrepiece on the coffee table, it is also an instant mood-lifter. It triggers feelings of joy, hope and gratitude, which are like medicine for your mood.

You can use one of the many photo sticks, little devices which gather all your photos from your phone and computers and tablets and make it easier to sort through duplicates and dates.

Then you can choose from many different online photobook shops. Most allow you to send photos digitally and then have your fully produced book delivered to you. There are various levels of sophistication, so you can decide if you want total control over layout, or whether you prefer a ‘done-for-you’ template.

Google “photo book” to get started now.

1. So creative!

You go to sleep worrying over a problem, and when you wake up, the answer seems obvious.

According to Professor Penny Lewis from Cardiff University, the two main phases of sleep – REM and non-REM – work together to help us find out-of-the-box solutions to problems.

During non-REM sleep, millions of neurons fire simultaneously and strongly while your brain replays memories. As your brain reruns the memories, it makes links and connections to make sense of patterns.

During REM sleep, it all gets more chaotic, says Lewis. Different parts of your brain become activated, seemingly at random. Lewis suggests this allows your brain to search for similarities between seemingly unrelated concepts, so you can see a problem in a different way.

2. Better reaction times

Like a superhero in a movie, you will find your reflexes and reactions are sharper. Even if your job does not involve split-second decisions, your reaction times can still be a matter of life and death. Every time you get behind the wheel of a car, your reflexes matter.

According to the Sleep Foundation, if you skip a night’s sleep, your impairment is equivalent to a blood alcohol content of 0.1% - that is double the legal limit.

3. Laser sharp memory

When you get enough sleep, you will find you retain information more easily. You read it once, and you remember it. You no longer have that mental blank trying to remember that password – or forgetting why you walked into the kitchen.

Harvard Health says both animal and human studies suggest that the quantity and quality of sleep have a profound impact on learning and memory. Sleep helps you focus and learn, and it helps you consolidate memories.

4. Brighter mood

Sleep affects your mood, and your mood can affect how well you sleep.

Disturbed sleep is one of the first symptoms of depression. Conversely, chronically poor sleep can lead to depression. A study published in Sleep Journal in 2007 found that out of 10,000 adults, people with insomnia were five times more likely to develop depression.

Another study by the University of Pennsylvania found that subjects who were limited to only 4.5 hours of sleep a night for one week reported feeling more stressed, angry, sad, and mentally exhausted. When the subjects resumed normal sleep, they reported a dramatic improvement in mood.

* 17 March is World Sleep Day.

Improve your sleep, improve your mood

If you struggle with sleep and stress, the last thing you want to hear is that insomnia can exacerbate depression and anxiety. But it can help to know what you are dealing with, and to know there are many proven tactics and strategies you can use to improve your sleep.

If you are worried about your sleep, Harvard Medical School advises you first look at your sleep habits. Their recommendations include:

• maintaining a regular sleep-wake schedule
• avoiding caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, and other chemicals that interfere with sleep
• making your bedroom a comfortable sleep environment
• establishing a calming pre-sleep routine
• going to sleep when you are truly tired
• not watching the clock at night
• not napping too close to your regular bedtime
• eating and drinking enough – but not too much or too soon before bedtime
• exercising regularly – but not too soon before bedtime

We often do not realise our stress and our skin breakouts are related, but think about the last time your skin flared up. Were you under stress?

Perhaps it was a new job that caused a red rash around your chin.

Or a relationship breakdown that made you break out in hives.

You might even remember when you were a teenager, stressed about an upcoming performance or party, then horrified to discover your acne had flared up.

It seems like an unfair double whammy, for our skin to betray us when we are down. Why does it happen?

The inflammation pathway

Stress can cause a chemical reaction that affects your skin.

Dr Neera Nathan, writing for Harvard Health, explains:

“The brain-skin axis is an interconnected, bidirectional pathway that can translate psychological stress from the brain to the skin and vice versa.”

Dr Nathan says stress triggers glands which release more cortisol and other hormones called catecholamines, which in turn cause inflammation. Stress can also cause inflammation through the gut-skin connection. Stress impacts the balance of bacteria in your gut, which can lead to inflammation.

The inflammation is intended to help you: it is to heal the wounds that your body is anticipating from the stressful situation. But in our modern world, the inflammation is more likely to cause redness and itching, and trigger conditions such as psoriasis, rosacea, and eczema.

It is psychodermatological

The study of the connection between skin and mind is called psychodermatology.

A 2020 study review of research studies by the University of Messina in Italy found that people affected by a skin disorder often have a related psychological problem.

They cite numerous studies which showed that people with depression and anxiety often have skin conditions, and vice versa. Interestingly, they also found a link in skin problems with people who reported high levels of anger and disgust.

How to reduce the impact of stress on your skin

The best way to manage stress induced skin flare ups is to manage stress. Dial-up all your stress management tactics such as:

• Practise mindfulness or meditation
• Reduce screens and social media in your leisure time and get more sleep
• Move your body as much as you can with activities you find enjoyable
• Eat more anti-inflammatory foods, including foods high in vitamin B, magnesium and fatty acids such as fish, whole grains and fruit and vegetables
• Stay hydrated
• Take time for yourself as much as possible. Do what makes you feel good, even if it is not “productive”
• And do not forget to keep up your skin care routine.

Important. Never self-diagnose. If you notice a rash or new skin problem – even if you have been stressed – see your doctor for a proper diagnosis. Different skin issues require different treatment.

Prepare in advance.

Don’t waste that precious shopping, prepping and cooking time on just one meal. Make sure you have plenty of leftovers that can be packed in portion-sized containers ready for lunches the following day. If you won’t be able to re-heat food, you can mix any vegetables, protein and/or grains from your dinner plate and toss with some greens and dressing to make a salad. Leftover brown rice? Mix with chicken, corn, baby spinach and black beans.

If you feel inspired, you can also cook up meals in advance in the weekend. Casseroles, chilli, pasta dishes, soups and stir-fries can be doubled, divided and stored, suggest the Tufts Health & Nutrition Letter. In the warmer weather, substantial salads based on grains like barley, quinoa or freekeh can also be divided up for lunches.

Stock up on staples.

No leftovers? Keep some of your favourite lunch items ready to go. Some ideas you can pack in a bento-style box: fruit, hard-boiled eggs, falafel, small cans of tuna, pre-cut veggies like carrots, celery, cherry tomatoes and cauliflower, rice/corn cakes, sliced or cubed cheese, and small servings or trail mix, seeds or nuts.

You can portion out bean dips, nut butters and plain yoghurt, or purchase them pre-packaged. Tufts Health & Nutrition Letter recommends you aim for a lunch that is half vegetables and fruit, one quarter wholegrain, and one quarter protein.

Chill!

To keep your food safe from harmful bacteria, make sure you pack an ice block in your insulated lunch bag – more than one if your lunch won’t be refrigerated when you get to work.