It is a tricky situation: you do not want your children eating too much sugar (and all those artificial additives). And yet you want your children to grow up seeing food as a source of joy, not shame.

You know from experience that if you deny yourself a certain food, you end up craving it. We tend to want what we cannot have.

So how should you handle it?

Registered dietitian and producer of Nutrition for Littlies, Alyssa Miller, says there is nothing wrong with sweet food. It is just an intense source of instant energy.

“In the end, we want to raise conscious eaters, who know how foods affect their body and how to eat all foods in a way that makes them feel good,” says Miller.

She says to keep focusing on how foods make us feel instead of warning your children they will be sick if they eat too many Halloween lollies, say something like, “My belly gets a little upset when I eat too much candy, I think I will have a few tonight and save some for another day.”

If – or when you eat candy, stop yourself from saying things like “I’m being bad tonight” or “I’m going to have to go to the gym tomorrow.”

Remember: no food is “bad”, and eating is not something that should ever be punished.

Do not eat too much, too late

People whose largest meal is in the evening may be heavier and have bigger blood fats and blood sugar after eating, found a 2020 review of studies published the Journal of Neurochemistry.

But before you get too alarmed, this does not mean you have to skip dinner or go to bed hungry.

“Nothing bad is going to happen if you eat a balanced dinner earlier in the evening, or have a small protein-rich snack to quell hunger pangs before you go to bed,” says dietitian Abby Langer.

“Your body knows what to do with the food you consume in the dark, trust me.”

Alan Flanagan, author of the 2020 study, agrees, saying it is more about thinking about total energy distribution throughout the whole day.

“In people with impaired glucose control [higher than normal blood sugar levels] the evidence is overwhelmingly in favour of greater distribution of total daily energy earlier in the days,” he says.

“When over 35 per cent of energy comes later in the day, that’s pretty consistently associated with increased BMI, body fat percentage, and cardiometabolic risk, in particular diabetes risk.”

Other studies from 2022 supported these conclusions, finding:

• People were significantly hungrier than they had a late-eating compared to early-eating schedule.
• Later eating caused people to burn less fat and fewer calories, and pushed their fat cells to store more fat.
• Earlier eaters had greater improvements in their blood sugar, cholesterol levels and insulin sensitivity (a marker of diabetes risk) and lost more weight than later eaters.

Making it work for you

It is not practical for many of us to eat our largest meal in the morning, so how can you optimise your health without too much disruption?

• Do not skip breakfast. This does not mean you have to eat as soon as you get up, but try to eat the majority of your calories during the morning and afternoon.
• Aim to eat dinner earlier in the evening. Avoid sitting down at 10pm to eat. Instead, if you are a late eater, start by moving your meal at least one hour earlier than usual, aiming to eat dinner no later than two to three hours before bed.
• Lighten the load. Make dinner a meal that is chock full of vegetables rather than carbohydrates, and switch to eating most of your carbs (bread, pasta etc) to earlier in the day when you are more sensitive to insulin. You will still gain benefits even if you can only do this for four or five days a week.

Why does balance matter?

Many people take their balance for granted, until it is taken away by eye or ear conditions, or general ageing.

Yet it turns out it is a vitally important clue to your health, now and into the future.

In 2022, a team of researchers from Brazil, Finland, USA, UK and Australia published research in the British Journal of Sports Medicine.

They reported that inability to pass the 10 second balance test was associated with a twofold risk of death from any cause within 10 years.

Without good balance, you are more prone to falls. And falls are the second leading cause of unintentional injury deaths worldwide.

How to improve your balance

If you tried the test and found it hard, do not worry. Balance can be improved through simple and low-cost balance training.

Balance is strongly related to strength. The stronger your muscles, particularly big muscles like your legs and core, the better your balance is likely to be.

Physiotherapists recommend these exercises to work on your balance:

1. Start by changing your “base of support”. That is, the surface you are standing on, for example:

• balance on one leg
• balance with your feet one in front of the other, like you are standing on a tightrope
• stand on something unstable, such as cushions, a foam mat or wobble board.

2. Add a change to your visual input

While trying any movement from point 1, try closing your eyes, turning your head or moving your eyes from side to side or up and down. This will challenge your vestibular system or inner ear.

3. Add dynamic movement

While doing 1 and 2, try movement such as:

• moving your arms, legs or torso
• holding weights in your hands or as ankle weights
• combine more complicated movements like walking along an imaginary tightrope

Yet for many of us, these ways of thinking are making us miserable.

You probably do not realise you are doing it. But chances are that at some point today, you have had thoughts or made assumptions that are deeply unhelpful – and probably incorrect.

You are not alone. It turns out many of us share the same unhelpful thinking styles. Here we outline the four most common patterns, with advice from a clinical psychologist on how to overcome them.

• All-or-nothing thinking

Also called black-white thinking, this thinking style only allows one extreme or another, with nothing in between. You are either good or bad, perfect or a failure. You do not allow yourself the compassion to see yourself as a flawed but wonderful human.

Clinical Psychologist Dr Gemma Healey advises: “Try catching these thoughts and saying ‘Ah, there’s the ‘I‘m not good enough’ story’, or ‘Ah, there’s the I’m a failure story’.”

• Catastrophising

When you take a small problem and imagine the worst outcome possible, you are catastrophising. You might make a mistake in your job, and then imagine that you will lose your job, lose your home and lose your family because of your failure.

Dr Healey says: try allowing your thoughts to come and go on their own without hooking into them. You can do this by imagining your thoughts as leaves floating by on a stream, as cars travelling on the freeway, or as clouds floating in the sky.

• Shoulding and musting

Whenever you notice yourself saying “should” or “must”, it is a sign you could be setting yourself unfair expectations.

While sometimes it can be helpful, such as “I should wear safety equipment for this job”, it is more usually associated with blame and guilt. “I should be less emotional”, or “I should not eat so much.”

Dr Healey says: “When you notice yourself should-ing or must-ing try and bring some flexibility into the rule by softening it to something like “It would be nice if…”, or ”I would prefer it if…”.”

• Overgeneralising

If you have even grabbed onto one negative thing that happened in the past, and assumed it will always keep happening over and over, you are overgeneralising. It is the classic, “this always happens to me” type of thinking, similar to “I never get things right”, or “people always misunderstand me”. Words like “always” and “never” are strong clues.

Dr Healey’s advice is to notice and challenge the thought. Ask yourself, “Is it true that I never…? Can I think of situations where this has not applied?”

How to catch your thoughts

The problem with thought patterns like unhelpful thinking is that we often do not realise we are doing it.

The key to overcoming unhelpful thinking is to start to tune in and notice the thoughts. This takes practice.

Each day, take 5-10 minutes to practice noticing your thoughts. Go somewhere you will not be disturbed and take some deep breaths to quieten your mind.

Then start noticing the thoughts that go through your mind. Try not to judge them or get caught up in them. Simply notice. Then you can start to recognise some of the styles listed here.

This helps you separate yourself from negative thoughts, so you have more choice in how you respond to each thought.

Why do we compare ourselves?

Comparison starts out as a positive technique.

Looking at what other people do has been essential to our survival. As children, we learnt by observing those around us. And hundreds of thousands of years ago, our ancestors learnt how to avoid danger by watching who survived, why and how.

Yet too often, we turn it from a positive into a debilitating negative.

Social media does not help. We see everyone’s highlights reel – the best moments of their holiday, the most stylist shots of their loungeroom, their children’s achievements – and we compare it to the worst of our lives. As the saying goes, you are comparing your insides to everyone else’s outsides.

Social Comparison Theory is a psychological theory that says there are two kinds of comparison:

1. Upwards: we compare ourselves to those we think are better than us.

2. Downwards: we compare ourselves to those we think are worse than us, to try to make ourselves feel better.

How to manage it

In her book, Comparisonitis, author and podcaster Melissa Ambrosini provides a four-step formula for freeing yourself from the cycle of negative comparison. She uses the acronym ACES.

• A is for awareness: become aware that you are comparing. Sometimes you might notice the feeling, before you realise what you are thinking.
• C is for choose: choose a different path. Ask yourself, what do you want to feel instead? You do not have to get stuck in the feelings of unworthiness.
• E is for eliminate, or exit or exhale: eliminate the trigger that caused your spiral into comparison. If it was Instagram for example, then log out and move onto something else. It is not about avoiding difficult situations or feelings, but instead noticing them and managing them.
• S is for shift your state: take action to change your energy. Get up and do something that lifts your spirits, such as dancing or listening to upbeat music.

How to use comparison as a gift

Ontological Coach and founder of Being, the Change, Chyonne Kreltszheim, suggests that the process of comparing yourself to others can be turned into a power for good.

She says, “The gift of comparisonitis is that it tells us what is important to us. It is a marker of our needs, values and priorities. It is like a signal being sent up from the depths of our subconscious mind to remind us that something we care about is at stake.”

The trick, she says, is to stay curious and ask questions so we can learn from the feelings, and not get caught up in them.

For example, if you are feeling unsettled by a friend’s recent promotion, ask yourself, “Why is this bothering me?”

If it is highlighting your own frustration in your current role, you could use it as motivation to take your job to the next level.

“Use the comparisonitis to find out what you really want and invest your energy in moving towards that,” says Kreltszheim.

Is iron deficiency the same as anaemia?

“Iron deficiency is not a black and white thing. It develops in stages with anaemia being the final result.” Says Dr Crowe. Anaemia is when your blood lacks adequate healthy red blood cells, and you can be low in iron but not yet have anaemia. Blood tests ordered by your doctor can tell you what stage you are at.

Do not be tempted to take an iron supplement ‘just in case’ unless your doctor recommends it, as they can cause side effects and can be toxic in high doses.

Do I have to eat meat to get enough iron?

You are less likely to be low in iron if you eat meat because the iron in animal foods is more easily absorbed by our bodies. Liver is the richest source, followed by red meat (lamb, beef and kangaroo), then pork, chicken, shellfish, fish and eggs.

Plants contain iron too, just in a form not so well absorbed. But you can increase how much you absorb by including a source of vitamin C with a plant-based meal. This might be a glass of orange juice, a salad of raw tomatoes and red capsicum, or fruit such as kiwifruit, citrus fruit or berries.

Good plant sources of iron include nuts, dried fruit, legumes and tofu, and dark leafy green vegetables.

A product that is 100 per cent peanuts has many nutrition benefits:

• Protein. Peanuts are a legume (like beans, peas and lentils) and so are protein rich.
• Fibre. Peanut butter has 1.8g fibre in a tablespoon.
• Heart-healthy fats. Half the fat in peanut butter is made up of oleic acid, a healthy type of monounsaturated fat.
• Vitamins and minerals. Vitamins E, B6 and B3, folate, magnesium, copper and manganese, and heart-healthy polyphenols.

But peanut butter is not always just peanuts, found researchers from consumer advocacy group Choice. They tested peanut butters on offer in supermarkets and found many contain added sugar and salt. The amount varies, so it pays to read the label. If the product is not 100 per cent peanuts, look further. Some contain both sugar and salt, while others just a pinch of salt.

Some “light” varieties have 25 per cent less fat, but Choice warns that the trade-off is a product that is about 25 per cent less peanuts and padded out with a type of starch typically used as a thickener or filler.

If it is important to you, you might also want to check if you can buy peanut butter made from local ingredients.

- Go to a playground. This one is more fun with a friend. Go to a kids’ playground and play on the equipment. Try the monkey bars, go up and down the slide as many times as you can. (Tip: better to do when playgrounds are emptier, such as toddler dinnertime, and make sure the equipment can hold your weight!)

- Birding. It is walking – with a purpose. Go for a walk or hike and look for birds. You could use an app such as Merlin Bird ID, or just write it in a notebook. Or if birds are not your thing, look for particular cars, or bikes or a random focus such as unique letterboxes or street art.

Do we need to ban the beans?

According to Tuffs Health & Nutrition letter, there is no evidence that antinutrients in commonly consumed foods lead to mineral deficiencies. It says that a varied diet should give us plenty of minerals, and the small percentage we cannot absorb because they are bound to antinutrients should not be a problem.

If you eliminated or reduced the foods that contain antinutrients you would lose vital sources of dietary fibre, vitamins including A, C, E, B group, K and E, minerals healthy fats, phytochemicals, and antioxidants like lutein and zeaxanthin. The health benefits of a diet rich in plant foods far outweighs the minerals lost through antinutrients.

The benefits of antinutrients

Many antinutrients, rather than something to avoid, are now even considered health-promoting, says Jill Joyce, Assistant Professor of Public Health Nutrition at Oklahoma State University. Writing in the Conversation, Professor Joyce says that the most frequently eaten antinutrients can support the immune system, lower the risk of cancer, type 2 diabetes and cardiovascular disease, inhibit the growth of bacteria and fungi, and may decrease cholesterol levels and blood pressure.

This does not mean you should never give them a second thought. If you are at risk of a disease related to mineral deficiencies, such as osteoporosis with calcium deficiency or anaemia with iron deficiency, speak to an Accredited Practising Dietitian for advice on how to monitor your food choices for antinutrient content.

Can we reduce antinutrients?

Soaking, boiling or other high-heat processes remove many antinutrients, and in some cases, such as certain lectins, it is essential that we destroy them.

Boiling beans for at least 10 mins inactivates the lectins, as does the canning process. Be warned that cooking in a slow cooker without first boiling for 10 minutes will not destroy the lectins.